A Couple Steps Forward, A Bajillion Steps Backwards.
Sorry I’ve kind of stopped blogging for a little bit. I’ve been having a very rough week. I know this title sounds cliche but it really describes how I feel right now. So this post is going to be
a little bit very negative.
About a week ago, I had four days of following my meal plan, being able to exercise, and calling my OA sponsor if I needed to talk to someone about pretty much anything. Then something happened, I can’t quite remember, and I started over eating (by a lot) last Wednesday night. Yikes, it’s almost been a week of that. Like I’ve said before, once I start with the binging/overeating, it’s really hard to get back on track following my meal plan. I feel just awful. The jeans I bought last week are really tight now and I’m not looking forward to my dietitian appointment tomorrow. This negativeness is also caused in part by the fact that my knee is getting worse, and I have no clue what’s wrong with it. I can’t do any form of exercise, even walking hurts. I feel so out of shape and just generally awful. The negative thoughts are running wild in my brain.
On the bright side, my mom is starting to recognize the signs that mean I’m in a binge phase and learning what to do in certain situations. I know I shouldn’t have to depend on her, but she does want to help. She’s learning what my trigger foods for binges are, what to say if I was to ask for them, and what not to say to me about food because it could really set me off. I’m very grateful that she’s learning and open to helping me. As much as I want to say “gosh, it’s about time!” I don’t know what I would do without her sometimes.
So today, I’m vowing to get back on track with my meal plan and become abstinent from the over eating. Even if that means having to give up certain foods because I can’t seem to eat them in normal quantities/portions, that’s what I have to do. I will follow my meal plan. I will journal. I will call my sponsor if I’m having trouble. I will structure my time so I’m not bored. I will use the new polishing station I got for my jewelry making! Yay shiny stuff!
What self improvement task(s) are you working on right now?
Have a good day everyone, thanks for reading 🙂